through the eyes of an enigma… el maèstro

Spawn and Gone

divorceSo I usually stay as far as possible from topics which everybody is writing on, however this day always hits close to home and irritate the life outta me. Father’s Day has always been a thorn in my side, this is because for as far as I can remember there has not been a father in my life at all. Unless you count my mother and I love her to death for always being there for me.

Before I go any further let me clarify this, a father is not just someone who got  a woman pregnant. No! There is so much more to that story, a father, in my eyes, is a guy who had a child and was man enough to stick around and be there for the child as the years go by to teach them lessons only a father can teach. To sit and listen to the son go through whatever problems he would be more comfortable telling a man. Setting an example for the son to follow, to show what it means to be a real man. Growing up I had no father figure with whom I could identify and as such I grew up with an emotional disconnect as I always kept everything inside, its only been recently since I have begun to open up (but thats for another post).

The father-child relationship is the defining factor of the fatherhood role. “The majority of Fathers are naturally protective and supportive responsible parents who are able to engender a number of significant benefits for themselves, their communities, and most importantly, their children.” Involved fathers offer developmentally specific provisions to their sons and daughters throughout the life cycle and are impacted themselves by their doing so. Active father figures have a key role to play in reducing behaviour problems in boys and psychological problems in young women.

Most of my friends either don’t know their father or had not grown up with him around, which leaves me to wonder, was that generation just a bunch of bums who had children just because they can? then leave them on the mother to struggle to make ends meet? How can you look at your seed, your own flesh and blood and then not want to be a part of their lives? This is something that I cannot  fathom, I probably should ask Mr. Senior Jr. and see what his contribution is.

It has been said that “Men often father children but don’t recognize them” – this rings very true as  i doubt my father would recognise myself or any of my sisters at this point in life, as not one of us has had a relationship with him since I became a teen, which of course means that they really have no idea what he was like….

Before I keep ranting and don’t stop let me say that there are great fathers out there who take care of their children, whether they are physiically there everyday or no, and to those select few i say “HAPPY FATHER’S DAY!”


Comments on: "Spawn and Gone" (6)

  1. Wow … honestly I was about to write a post like that today, but my mind told me that you would have something to say on this topic. I thought of you this morning, especially since you and your siblings have no relationship with your dad. Its sad that these assholes out there have kids and want nothing to do with them, while there are guys out there who wish they could have kids. I tell you, the world is a fucked up place. Although you grew up without having your dad around, I think you turned out just fine! 🙂

  2. awwww….thanks i try to be the best i can be (sounds like an ad for the Marines)

    i was having a horrid day yesterday and this comment put a smile on my face, and the other had me cracking up!!!

  3. and hey really lady….get out my mind lol
    if we gona keep thinking up similiar topics we might as well start a blog together lol

  4. Aww glad I could make you smile 😀 and its funny that we think so much alike. I miss you 😦 I sighed up for digicel postpaid with my company, just so I could call you. It should be up next week. Starting a blog together would be such an adventure 😀 lol.

    And starting a private blog is totally free and easy. Just go to that blog’s dashboard, then SETTINGS then PRIVACY. Select “I would like my blog to be visible only to users I choose” and then select the wordpress users who u wanna grant access.

  5. :)…awww….u did? darn i can’t wait to hear from u :D:D

    for real we should. a writer’s cyanide lol…i would enjoy that

    hehe…i figured it out today, actually started it made a post but i editing it
    send me ur username so i can add u

  6. Username is “triviere” … cant wait to read it. add me then send me the link 🙂

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